Do you ever want to question God?

Another one of my favorite songs...one that totally voices what I am feeling at this time in my life:

Lord You seem so far away
A million miles or more it feels today
And though I haven't lost my faith
I must confess right now
That it's hard for me to pray
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give the grace
With all that's in my heart

Chorus:
I will sing I will praise
Even in my darkest hour
Through the sorrow and the pain
I will sing I will praise
Lift my hands to honor You
Because Your Word is true
I will sing

Lord it's hard for me to see
All the thoughts and plans You have for me
But I will put my trust in You
Knowing that You died to set me free
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give grace
With all that's in my heart

Lord may I leave my life more and more in your hands and trust your will as best for my life! I love you Lord Jesus!

For my dear sister (in law)...I am praying for you!

Sometimes we don't know why the Lord does what He does or why He allows certain things to happen in our lives or the lives of those we love. Many time we, like Job, question God asking why...why us?
But one thing I know that through the love of Christ we will be able to carry on. Through the great gift and sacrifice of our Heavenly Father we are able to get through the hard times. Yes I know that this is all easy for me to say but I know we serve the same Lord Jesus and His love is the same everywhere.
Melissa this song is for you...I hope that it will help and encourage you as much as it has helped me. Hold on to the love of Christ because through it you and your Mom and your whole family will soar like the eagle for He will carry you through!

Lord I come to You
Let my heart be changed, renewed
Flowing from the grace
That I’ve found in You
Lord I’ve come to know
The weakenesses I see in me
Will be stripped away
By the power of Your love

~ chorus ~
Hold me close
Let Your love surround me
Bring me near
Draw me to Your side
And as I wait
I’ll rise up like the eagle
And I will soar with You
Your Spirit leads me on
In the power of Your love

Lord unveil my eyes
Let me see You face to face
The knowledge of Your love
As You live in me
Lord renew my mind
As Your will unfolds in my life
In living every day
By the power of Your love

(repeat chorus twice)

And I will soar with You
Your Spirit leads me on
In the power of Your love

I love you sister! Prayers are always with you!

I Love Nursing!

It was working the last two days that showed me more then ever how much I love to be a nurse. It was having two patients pass away in two days that made me thankful even more for chosing this profession. It was hard emotionally and physically but yet I felt drawn more to the job I am in.
We as nurses have so much potential to help people, to encourage people, to support people, and to just be there with them. We have the privelege of making our patients comfortable in their last hours and minutes of their lives. We have the honor of holding their hand so that they know they are not alone. We have the joy of helping someone get better when we all thought that they were dying...and the list continues.
It was extremly hard seeing death...it can be such a horrible thing...but it is through death that the Lord uses us in this profession.
I pray that in all I do that the Lord will use me to be a witness for Him, to pray for those I care for, to pray for family that watches all of this.
I know this blog is a bit disorganized but I had to write my thoughts as these last two days were so difficult...and yet like I said before these last two days proved to me that I am in the right place.
Lord help me to do my best for you!

Laundry Party

Have you ever had a laundry party? Well we have and boy is it a lot of fun...laundry, food, and a good movie...and life is just great! So here are just a couple of pictures of us having fun at the laundry party!


Even my cat enjoyed it!


Yes life can be so much fun...although don't ask me what the movie was about...I think we were laughing too much!

How Short Life is...

The Bible says that man's life is as a flower of the field...one day is there and the next day its not. Do you ever go to work wondering if you will be coming home that night? Do you leave home saying good bye to those you love wondering whether or not you will see them again? This is the reality of the world we live in.
I am working on a cardiac medicine floor in the hospital here. I have thought about the brevity of life so much as I see people who one day were strong and healthy and the next day are in hospital wondering how long it will be before their heart gives out...I have seen people who were having a wonderful time with family and friends and half an hour later are in hospital due to a vehicle collision. This is the reality of life.
God calls us to live each day for His glory and honor. To live each day spreading the Word because we never know if this day is our last day. For those of us who know the Lord Jesus this time can be exciting...but for those who don't know Him it can be scary. Lets share the Word and live each day to its fullest of working in the Kingdom of God because you don't know when the Lord will call you or your neighbor home! Life is short....

Of Tons of Homework...and Frustrating Computers!

Yes I have been trying to study for the course that I am taking on the human heart. It is such an interesting course as it describes how the heart is so intricately made. I often wonder how people continue to say that humans evolve when they read the miracle of creation!
The final exam for this course is next week so that means I have to study much harder then I was studying before. I find it hard to study when I am working full time but I have to give it my all in order to pass this course.
My computer has been really frustrating of late as it loves to freeze. I have a dell notebook and I am pretty sure that next computer I get it won't be a dell...but I should not complain and be thankful for the computer I have.
But for now it is back to the books...

Thank you Lord for Family!

I am really enjoying being back here in Orangeville Ontario, Canada. I started this week working at Headwaters Health Care Center on a Cardiac/Medicine floor. I am really enjoying working there. The staff are awesome there making a great team to work with.

Tonight I went to watch my younger brother's hockey game tonight and was thankful that I was able to do that for him.

I had an interview this week at the Avalon Care Center for a casual position as an RN there. This is a nursing home that I had volunteered there for five years starting when I was fourteen. It was exciting to see people that I had not seen for some time. I feel like I have come home!

Other then that I have been enjoying the time spent with family and friends back home thanking the Lord for a social life that I have never had in Ottawa! I am so happy to be back home in Orangeville!

Singing to the Lord...

You know how sometimes the Lord speaks to us in different ways. I find the Lord touches my heart through songs alot. I love driving by myself and singing with the worship CD's I play...just praising or praying to the Lord. And with this all I am thankful that we don't need to have a voice of a famous singer to praise the Lord...but that the Lord says to make a "joyful noise" to the Lord.
My song for this week is sung well by Darlene Zschech, called "Power of your Love". Here are the lyrics:

Lord I come to You
Let my heart be changed, renewed
Flowing from the grace
That I've found in You
And Lord I've come to know
The weaknesses I see in me
Will be stripped away
By the power of Your love

Hold me close
Let Your love surround me
Bring me near
Draw me to Your side
And as I wait
I'll rise up like an eagle
And I will soar with You
Your spirit leads me on
By the Power of Your love

Lord unveil my eyes
Let me see you face to face
The knowledge of Your love
As you live in me
And Lord renew my mind
As Your will unfolds in my life
In living every day
By the Power of Your love

This song has been my prayer many times especially when times get hard and stressful because it is the power of the Love of the Lord that keeps me alive and able to face a new day! May you all find the joy in knowing the true love of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ!

Prayer on my heart...

This has been the prayer of my heart on so many different occasions:

Show me Your ways
That I may walk with You
Show me Your ways
I put my hope in You
Chorus:
The cry of my heart
Is to love You more
To live with the
Touch of Your hand
Stronger each day
Show me Your ways

I thank the Lord for the patience He has with me day after day. I pray that the Lord will continue to shape and refine my life so that I may be more fit for the work He has for me to do here on this earth.

My Journey Back...and the Lords Never Ending Miracles!

I stood back again this week and thanked the Lord for the miracles that have happened in my life!

This week I drove back from Ottawa to Orangeville. I had asked a lot of people to pray for me as I drove back knowing that the drive from Ottawa to Toronto can be very difficult at the end of January. It stormed the day before I came home, and it stormed the day after I came home. However the trip home was the beautiful. It was sunny and clear the whole way down! Thank you Lord for answering the prayers of so many and bringing me back safe and sound!

I start work in Orangeville in about a week. I am really looking forward to it, as a new opportunity to serve my community! Thank you Lord for this opportunity!

This is all I have to say for now...a longer post will be coming shortly!

The time is soon approaching....

You know when I went to University for Nursing I never dreamed that I would be in Ottawa...or that after a year of working here I would be moving back to work in my own community hospital. I never dreamed that I would have the opportunity to be able to serve so many different people. Sometimes I sit back and am awed at how the Lord has worked in my life in a way I never had dreamed of.
Soon I will be returning to Orangeville, Ontario which is my home town. I will be working at Headwaters Health Care Center...giving back to my community! Working here in Ottawa has been an awesome experience for me in many ways. I have learned so much in working at the Ottawa Hospital...the staff on 7West at the General Campus have been just awesome! Thanks guys! As well I have had the pleasure of working for two months at Hunt Club Manor which has also been a wonderful opportunity.
Attending church at the Alta Vista Baptist Church as well as at the Met has been a good experience as well. Thank you to all of you who made me feel welcomed!
As much as being in Ottawa for almost a year has been the hardest year of my life away from family and friends...I want to thank my family and friends back home who prayed...and prayed hard that the Lord would help me through it! Your prayers have been answered. I have a wonderful community back home and I look forward to going back to give back what so many people have given to me!
I will keep you posted as to the details in a later post! Goodnight for now!

The Sovereingty of God!

I have been doing a small Bible Study with my younger sister and we have chosen to go through the book of Matthew together. It has been a real eye opener for me as we have studied the first two chapters. The second chapter in the book of Matthew talks about the evil the Herod did when Jesus was born. I read that chapter two or three times wondering how I was going to explain the jewels found in this chapter. Then tonight the thought hit me....the jewels in this chapter explain the sovereingty of God in such a beautiful way. While everything seemed chaos after the birth of Jesus with Herod killing all the baby's two years old and younger...there was a miracle happening. The Lord was showing us how He was still in full control. He knew EVERYTHING that was happening. The Lord provided a way for Mary and Joseph in escaping from the evil hands of Herod.
What an example for us today. Even though the world seems full of chaos and at times it seems that our lives are such a mess...the Lord, our Saviour, our King, and our Father is in full control. He is there helping us find a way to trust Him and move forward in His plan for our lives. The Lord is there guiding our every step as He guided Mary and Joseph to Egypt, as He guided Moses and the children of Israel, and as He guided Paul and Silas.
What a chapter full of the jewels of the sovereingty of God! Take time to read through chapters praying that the Lord will show you the Jewels of His Word! Thank you Lord!

Christmas Greetings!

Yes it is the weekend before Christmas! I wanted to explain the real true meaning of Christmas. It all started many years ago...when the angel of the Lord appeared to Mary and told her she was going to be with child, "behold a virgin shall conceive and bear a son and shall call his name Immanuel...which being interpretedis God with us". She was going to carry a very special child. This child would be the Saviour of the world! That wonderful night a special child, a King, a Priest, a Saviour was born into the World, "and they called His name Jesus". This child grew and taught many people in the temples. He spoke against rules of the Scribes and Pharisees, He brought joy to little children, He brought healing to the sick, He comforted those who mourned...and the list could go on and on. And yet we all rejected Him, we all spat in His face...and yes sadly enough that list could go on too. But this wonderful King loved us in spite of all we did and died for us. This Saviour of the World sufferend Hell so that we might have life eternal! He suffered the rejection of God so that we could talk to Him face to face. Christmas is about the wonderful gift our Lord Jesus Christ has given to us! How can we thank Him for showing us unconditional love? How can we thank Him for giving us this awesome gift!

This Christmas the Lord took Tante Tena home so that she could be Home for Christmas! Grandma Bronsveld is also Home for Christmas! And if you accept the gift of the Lord Jesus Christ this Christmas...one day you also will be Home for Christmas!

May the Lord richly bless you all this Christmas and may you truely find the real JOY of Christmas this year!

Five Days Till Christmas!

Yes there are only five days till Christmas! Nathan is due to arrive here in Ottawa tomorrow evening! We plan to Christmas shop, watch movies, and just spend time together as brother and sister!

At home things are settling after Tante Tena's funeral. The kids all have Christmas holidays now...which is nice for Mom giving her a bit of a break. James and Melissa are planning on driving out to Pennsylvania to visit Melissa's family back in the USA. They will be back in time for celebrating the New Year in Orangeville with our family.

Here in Ottawa I have the privilege of working a day shift on Christmas. I pray that I may be able to bring Christmas cheer to those who are not well!

That is all for now...once Christmas is over I will have more news to tell you. At this point I want to wish you all a Blessed Christmas and God's richest blessing in the New Year!

In loving memory....

Today early this morning the Lord called home to Himself a faithful servant and dedicated prayer warrior. Tante Tena VanNoort was recieved in the arms of our Lord and Saviour this morning after a short but difficult battle with cancer.
The Lord had given Tante Tena a long a fruitful life. She has been such a blessing in our family. I remember the many times she came over to do mending for Mom. She would sit in the corner of the couch, drinking a cup of coffee and mending socks. We would have lunch together as a family on those days with usually egg salad sandwhiches. Tante Tena would share her many stories of her nursing career with us. I remember the times I would go to her house and help her spring clean. On those evenings we would sit together on the couch and she would be knitting slippers or baby outfits. We would talk and Tante Tena would bring out her photo albums. We looked at pictures of the babies that she delivered. She loved telling me her stories of when she was a nurse.
Tante Tena loved plants. I will never forget the poka dotted plant that she had. She gave me trimmings from it as that was how she collected most of her plants. She grew beautiful plants!
Tante Tena strongly encouraged and supported my desire to go into nursing. I know she prayed a lot! To the very end Tante Tena always asked me how my nursing was going.
I will never forget the time she came over and got to hold my little brother Daniel. She was so excited to be able to see him! At this point she already was frail and failing in health but she came to Orangeville and held him in her arms. She loved our family...she knit many pairs of slippers for us faithfully a new pair every year. When I came to visit her in Holland Christian Homes, shortly before she passed away, she would always ask how the family was...there was always such a look of love in her eyes!
I thank the Lord for the time we had with her. I will miss her greatly on this earth and I can't wait to see her in Heaven. She has a special place in my heart! I will carry her memories with me forever!
Thankyou Lord for the example Tante Tena has had in my life! Thank you for the many times we had together! Thankyou for taking her home to be with you in glory!

Everyday Life...

Life here in Ottawa is pretty busy. Somedays I think it will slow down...but looking ahead now I don't see that happening any time soon. I have started a second job in a retirement home. I will be doing orientation tomorrow and am actually looking forward to it. It will be a nice change of pace from the business of working in the hospital. Work in the hospital has been fairly busy. The days and nights I dread the most are the ones where we work short. However that has become more of a norm in a lot of places with the shortage of nurses. In times like this you learn how to prioritize really well.
My Crohn's disease has been more under control in the last two weeks after starting back on some meds again. One of the meds is an immunosuppresant so I have to be very careful not to pick up any infections...which is harder to do while working in the medical profession. However it is nice to finally have the pain more under control and being able to eat a little more normal again.
My cat is doing well. She is not all that happy with the many hours that I am working...but I think she is resigning herself to the fact. I think sometimes she misses the company of her cousins (my sister's cats).
Well that is enough for now. At least I can say I wrote another blog. Remember Christmas is only 30 days away! Oh do I ever love this time of year! Take care you all!

A message from me about Christmas

My favorite time of the year is Christmas. I start looking forward to Christmas already in September. Everyone laughs at me because of it...but you know I love Christmas!

Christmas is the best for a few reasons:

1) It is the time of year we celebrate the birth of our Saviour, Jesus Christ, who came to give His life so that we may have life! What better reason do I need to enjoy this time of year!

2) Family time is very important at this time of year. Christmas for most families has the opportunity to bring families together. In a lot of cases Christmas brings some of the wonderful, sharing attitudes of people in the community...I was reminded about this when I saw the Christmas boxes at church being ready for shipping to children in other countries.

3) Lights, decorations, christmas trees, snow, all part of a picturesque time of year. Its cozy....the Christmas tree up with lights around the room, fire in the fire place warming the room....yes its cozy!

This Christmas is somewhat different for me. It will be the first time that I will be six hours away on Christmas day. I pray that while I work that day in the hospital...the Lord will use me to bring Christmas cheer to those who have to spend the day in the hospital. When I honestly think about it...what better time of the year to be working and helping others.

So for now I will say to all of you reading this blog...take this time of year to reach out to others...not only with the physical things in life...but reach out with the Word of God. Share with others the most precious gift that was given to us...the gift of eternal life. The gift of the Lord Jesus Christ! Share the Christmas story! Pray for all those you come into contact with this Christmas! This is the true JOY of Christmas!

Well....

I was told to write a post again....watch for it in the next few day!!!!!!!!! :)

Post by Melissa and Me!

We were talking about cardiac markers today. After having bloodwork done today to check CRP, I was reminded about cardiac markers. Melissa was sure that CRP could indicate heart damage...for example it could identify a possible myocardial infarction. But we came to the conclusion that CRP was not the most accurate or well used blood test for identifying a myocardial infarction. CK-MB and myoglobin are the earliest cardiac markers and can be used to detect ischemic damage within an hour...however Troponin is the most widely used as well as the most accurate.

CRP though, is mainly used to indicate the level of inflammation in the body. Usually it only indicates acute inflammation. This is the reason I had that test done.

So speak the greatest medical minds of the twenty first century! Any questions...please leave comments! ;)

Dealing with Pain

Have you ever had pain in your life? There are so many different kinds of pain, as well as so many different reasons for the pain. Pain can be emotional, physical and mental.
The reason I am writing this is because I am in the middle of a Crohns flareup and think about pain more then I really want to! :) But it also got me thinking that so many people in this world are in pain and it is more then just physical pain. Pain can not always be taken care of with pain killers...and not everyone can understand anothers pain.
However there is one person who can understand everyones pain no matter what kind of pain it is. That person is Jesus Christ. I am thankful that the Lord understands the pain that I go through and the pain that you go through. I am thankful that He is beside me every step of the way...carrying me when I feel like I can not go any further.
This post is not a complaining session...it is to tell you that there is hope for your pain. Cast your care on the Lord and He will care for you. Jesus says, "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:29-30
Go to our Saviour and lean on Him for He will get you through whatever you are facing today!